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GARNET'S HOMEMADE BEER (Ian Robb - To the tune of "Barrett's Privateers by Stan Rogers - 1976) Ian Robb - 1994 Oh, the year was Nineteen Seventy-eight (How I wish I'd never tried it now) When a score of men were turned quite green By the scummiest ale you've ever seen Oh, Garnet Rogers cried the town (How I wish I'd never tried it now) For twenty brave men, all masochists who Would taste for him his home-made brew This motley crew was a sickening sight (How I wish I'd never tried it now) There was caveman Dave with his eyes in bags He'd a hard-boiled liver and the staggers and jags God damn them all, I was told This beer was worth its weight in gold We'd feel no pain, shed no tears But it's a foolish man who shows no fear At a glass of Garnet's home-made beer Well we hadn't been there but an hour or two (How I wish I'd never tried it now) When a voice said, "Gimme some home-made brew" And Steeleye Stan hove into view God damn them all, I was told This beer was worth its weight in gold We'd feel no pain, shed no tears But it's a foolish man who shows no fear At a glass of Garnet's home-made beer Now Steeleye Stan was a frightening man (How I wish I'd never tried it now) He was eight feet tall and four feet wide He said, "Pass that jug or I'll tan your hide" God damn them all, I was told This beer was worth its weight in gold We'd feel no pain, shed no tears But it's a foolish man who shows no fear At a glass of Garnet's home-made beer Stan took one sip and pitched on his side (How I wish I'd never tried it now) Garnet was smashed with a gut full of dregs And his breath set fire to both me legs God damn them all, I was told This beer was worth its weight in gold We'd feel no pain, shed no tears But it's a foolish man who shows no fear At a glass of Garnet's home-made beer So here I lay in me twenty-third beer (How I wish I'd never tried it now) It's been ten years since I felt this way On the night before my wedding day God damn them all, I was told This beer was worth its weight in gold We'd feel no pain, shed no tears But it's a foolish man who shows no fear At a glass of Garnet's home-made beer (Contributed by Mel - June 2004)

    


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