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MONTANA (Frank Zappa) Frank Zappa & The Mothers - 1973 I might be movin' to Montana soon Just to raise me up a crop of Dental Floss Raisin' it up Waxen it down In a little white box That I can sell uptown By myself I wouldn't Have no boss, But I'd be raisin' my lonely Dental Floss Raisin' my lonely Dental Floss Well I just might grow me some bees But I'd leave the sweet stuff To somebody else . . . but then, on the other hand I would Keep the wax 'N melt it down Pluck some Floss 'N swish it aroun' I'd have me a crop An' it'd be on top (that's why I'm movin' to Montana) Movin' to Montana soon Gonna be a Dental Floss tycoon (yes I am) Movin' to Montana soon Gonna be a mennil-toss flykune I'm pluckin' the ol' Dennil Floss That's growin' on the prairie Pluckin' the floss! I plucked all day an' all nite an' all Afternoon . . . I'm ridin' a small tiny hoss (His name is MIGHTY LITTLE) He's a good hoss Even though He's a bit dinky to strap a big saddle or Blanket on anyway He's a bit dinky to strap a big saddle or Blanket on anyway Any way I'm pluckin' the ol' Dennil Floss Even if you think it is a little silly, folks I don't care if you think it's silly, folks I don't care if you think it's silly, folks I'm gonna find me a horse Just about this big, An' ride him all along the border line With a Pair of heavy-duty Zircon-encrusted tweezers in my hand Every other wrangler would say I was mighty grand By myself I wouldn't Have no boss, But I'd be raisin' my lonely Dental Floss Raisin' my lonely Dental Floss Raisin' my lonely Dental Floss Well I might Ride along the border With my tweezers gleamin' In the moon-lighty night And then I'd Get a cuppa cawfee 'N give my foot a push . . . Just me 'n the pygmy pony Over by the Dennil Floss Bush 'N then I might just Jump back on An' ride Like a cowboy Into the dawn to Montana Movin' to Montana soon (Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay) Movin' to Montana soon (Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay) Movin' to Montana soon (Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay) Movin' to Montana soon (Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay).... (Contributed by poochorange - June 2004) ***** MONTANA Frank Zappa - Helsinki 1974 Guy In The Audience: "Whipping Post"! FZ: Say that again please Guy In The Audience: "Whipping Post"! FZ: "Whipping Post"? Ok, just a second . . . (Do you know that?) Oh sorry, we don't know that one. Anything else? Hum me a few bars of it, please, just show me how it goes, please. Just sing, sing me "Whipping Post" and then maybe we'll play it with you Guy In The Audience: Ooh-ooh-ooh . . . FZ: Thank you very much. And now . . . Judging from the way you sang it, it must be a John Cage composition, right? Here we go, "Montana." One two, one two three four I might be movin' to . . . FZ: Hold it! Hold it! We can't possibly start the song off like that! Good God! That's inexcusable! What happened to you last night? Napoleon: George has a tape of it FZ: George has a tape of it? Ok, we'll use that in the second show Ready? "Montana" . . . Wait a minute, "Whipping Post," no, "Montana." One two, one two three four FZ: It's too fast for you? One two, one two three four I might be movin' to Helsinki soon Just to raise me up a crop of Dental Floss Raisin' it up Waxen it down Tying it to the Whipping Post In the middle of town But by myself I wouldn't Have no boss, 'Cause I'd be raisin' my lonely Whipping Post Raisin' my lonely Whipping Post Raisin' my lonely Whipping Post (Well) Well I just might grow me some thongs But I'd leave the heavy stuff To somebody else . . . now 'bout Chester? And then I would Get a person Tie him up To the Whipping Post And beat the living shit out of him So that guy in the audience was satisfied But by myself I wouldn't Have no boss, 'Cause I'd be raisin' my lonely Whipping Post Floss Movin' to Montana soon (well . . . ) Gonna be a Dental Floss tycoon (how unique!) (Whip! Whip!) Movin' to Montana soon (now . . . ) Gonna be a mennil-toss flykune (Yes, it's such a ballad at this tempo) Napoleon: Little Booger-bear . . . Boogers everywhere . . . FZ: And now for the thrilling conclusion of that song . . . (Contributed by Sören Sjögren - June 2004)

    


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