SWEET SIXTEEN
Roger Edens  1939

Judy Garland w Victor Young & his Orch  
rec July 28th 1939 Hollywood


For fifteen years I've played a waiting game,
I've suffered like they do in Russian plays!
But if what's in store is really what they claim,
I must admit that suffering really pays!
For fifteen years I've been just like a prisoner in a cell,
For fifteen years my life has been just - awful!

>From one to four was such a bore;
I remember how I hated having all those people pore over me
and talk baby talk; They'd say "Googoo, isn't she cunning, 
poor dear has her father's nose, he-he-he-he!".

The years from five to eight I hate;
I had grown into a very unattractive child, and 
consequently was utterly and completely ignored, but I 
didn't really mind!  I had a book of Mother Goose, and
Mother Goose is pretty hot stuff when you're five years old!

At nine I had measles, so that didn't count!

At ten I had reached the performing stage and at the drop
of a hat mother would call me in and have me sing "The
Rosary" for her guests. I will never forget how papa use to
squirm when I hit that high note!

>From eleven to thirteen I'd rather not speak of;
It was bad enough having Jimmy Dougall pull my hair in
school, but it was positively humiliating to have my own
mother refer to me as "her dear little duckling"!

At fourteen I had my first taste of romance;
It was at a party at dancing school, and he was younger than I was and shorter than I was.  Oh, but he had a
wonderful name - Archibald - and he really like me too
he really did, but I had to go and spoil it all!  I asked
him right out if he would be my best beau, and that was the
last I ever saw of him!

By now I was fifteen and pretty miserable;
Mother refused to let me wear any lipstick or rouge and
I went around looking as pale as death!  It was then I
decided to join a monastery, and I would have too if it
hadn't been for Bing Crosby!  I was afraid they wouldn't
have any radios in monasteries, so, I devoted my fifteenth
year to Kraft Cheese!

But now it's a different story,
I can brush away the tears,
And laugh at those awful fifteen years,
For now I'm sweet sixteen,
And I've got my first long dress!

I can even have a date one night a week,
I can paint my lips and rouge my cheek.
I'm sweet sixteen, but I really must confess
Although this grown-up life isn't simple,
I wouldn't change places with Shirley Temple!

Gee, it's great to be just as free as the birds above me,
I'm a Juliet out to get a Romeo to love me!

I ask you,
Please forget that I was an in-between,
I mean,
My flag's unfurled,
I'm a woman of the world,
I'm sweet sixteen!  [ends]





(Contributed by Peter Akers - May 2010)