TERRIBLE OPERATION BLUES Thomas A. Dorsey aka. Georgia Tom - 1930 Bring in the next patient, nurse Get up on this table, pull off that gown Raise up that right leg, let that left one down Pull off them stockings, that silk underwear The doctor's got to cut you, mama, don't know where You got two or three tumors, shaped like a cube Two or three leaks in your inner tube Bring on that ether, bring on that gas The doctor's got to cut you, mama, yas, yas, yas The doctor knows to fix it, the doctor knows just what to do Oh doctor, can I have a glass of water? Oh, not now Oh doctor, I'm so sick! Sh, be quiet, doctor ain't gonna hurt you Oh, what you gonna do with that long knife? Oh, that's just the doctor's tools Oh doctor, what you gon' do with that saw? Oh, we take off legs with that, that's all Ooooh! Be quiet, now, just a moment There you are, the doctor's through! Oh doctor, what did you take out of me? Oh, just a minute, I'll tell you, dear Four monkey wrenches, two horse-shay Pair of old britches and a bale of hay Your ribs were kinda loosened, they moved about if I hadn't sewed you up, everything woulda fell out I put in new tubes, tightened up the exhaust Went into your hood and cleaned your spark plugs off Your body's kinda weak, don't be hard From now on you'll be careful with them there connection rods Alright, doctor! The doctor knows to fix it, the doctor knows just what to do Gee, doctor, but I feel better That so? Yes, I feel kinda like I wanna do a little messin' 'round Fine, go ahead! Ooooh, my my my my That's the way patients do that come to this doctor, they don't die Your body's kinda weak, don't be hard From now on you'll be careful with them there connection rods Alright, doctor! The doctor knows to fix it, the doctor knows just what to do