AN ENGLISHMAN IN NEW YORK
(Creme / Godley)


Demented New York athletes
staggering round the block
Deforned Chicanos pour in, Chicago's
rolling stock
Digital bathrooms drilling for furs
Surgical stockings marked his and
hers
Guggenheim attitudes back to back
With Jewish Baroque

No way street
No way street
Happy to see you, have a nice day!

Defecting Russian dancers dance into
Hockney prints
Exclusive to Bloomingdales,
gift-wrapped in red
From the land of blue rinse
They boggle at menus in Olde English
verse
"Ode to burger" by Keats at his
worst
The hissing of omelettes the
breaking of legs
Don't shoot till you see the whites
of their eggs
The pink fillet mignon looks black
on the negs

Strange apparatus
You've never seen
Strange apparatus, even stranger
theme
Street alligators
Big Anglophile
Will navigate us through a change of
style

I came, I saw, what manner of beast
is this
New York, you talk a little bit left
of centre
A scream, a shout
New York is throwing its weight
about
Walk tall, walk straight, spit the
world right in the eye
The stranger the wood the straighter
the arrow
Dismembered hopeful My-Lai veterans
queuing for sleaze
"Sorry no dogs, no fags, no
shriners, and no amputees"
Sexual athlete applies for audition
Willing to make it in any position
Just one of the extras with blood on
their faces
In snow-white and the seven basket
cases
I'm happy and dopey and dirty in
places
No way street
No way street
Lock up your daughters, Avon
crawling!

Devoted collectors of paraphernalia
out walking the rock
Battle and bitch for the ultimate
kitch
of a crucifix clock
Two miniature romans, running on
rails
Appear every hour and bang in the
nails
I've got to have it, Christ, I gotta
be the first
on our block

Disturbing facts about Nazi splinter
groups seen on the news
They're picketing synagogues and
claiming that
Hitler was King of the Jews
Caught in the tunnel an ambulance
howls
A men's room attendant is flapping
his jowls
Ssshh, Howard Johnson is moving his
bowels

Strange apparatus
You've never seen
Strange apparatus, even stranger
theme
Street alligators
Big Anglophile
Will navigate us through a change of
style
Strange apparatus
You've never seen
Strange apparatus, even stranger
theme
Walk straight, walk tall, spit the
world right in the eye
The stranger the wood, the
straighter the arrow

No way street
No way street