I PARTED MY HAIR IN THE MIDDLE
(Worton David / C W Murphy 1913)

as recorded by George Formby
1926


I used to be bashful and shy,
For fast livin' I didn't care,
But now you can tell I'm a bit of a dog,
In fact I'm a devil-may-care!

They told me to lead a gay life,
A life that was dashing and free,
So I made me mind up to do something rash,
To show what a nut I could be!

So I parted me 'air in the middle,
In the middle, in the middle,
Now, when I leave my hotel,
Everyone follows me, dogs as well!

If I give a girl the glad eye,
I smile and I say, "twiddle twiddle!"
And I've smoked some brown paper without bein' ill
Since I parted me 'air in the middle!

(patter)

One night with a girl, you'll agree,
I 'ad an appointment and so,
And as I'm just a little bit spoony on 'er,
In me best Sunday clothes I did go.

I got her a nice bunch of flowers
From a dustbin just up the back street,
Then as I stood in front of the looking glass there,
To make my appearance complete.

I parted me 'air in the middle,
In the middle, in the middle,
Then I noticed our tom cat
Was washin' his face on the front door mat!

'E carefully curved his moustache,
Then at me his left eye he did twiddle,
Then I knew that he'd got an appointment as well,
'Cause he's parted 'is 'air in the middle!




(Transcribed by Peter Akers - January 2019)