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I PARTED MY HAIR IN THE MIDDLE (Worton David / C W Murphy 1913) as recorded by George Formby 1926 I used to be bashful and shy, For fast livin' I didn't care, But now you can tell I'm a bit of a dog, In fact I'm a devil-may-care! They told me to lead a gay life, A life that was dashing and free, So I made me mind up to do something rash, To show what a nut I could be! So I parted me 'air in the middle, In the middle, in the middle, Now, when I leave my hotel, Everyone follows me, dogs as well! If I give a girl the glad eye, I smile and I say, "twiddle twiddle!" And I've smoked some brown paper without bein' ill Since I parted me 'air in the middle! (patter) One night with a girl, you'll agree, I 'ad an appointment and so, And as I'm just a little bit spoony on 'er, In me best Sunday clothes I did go. I got her a nice bunch of flowers From a dustbin just up the back street, Then as I stood in front of the looking glass there, To make my appearance complete. I parted me 'air in the middle, In the middle, in the middle, Then I noticed our tom cat Was washin' his face on the front door mat! 'E carefully curved his moustache, Then at me his left eye he did twiddle, Then I knew that he'd got an appointment as well, 'Cause he's parted 'is 'air in the middle! (Transcribed by Peter Akers - January 2019)


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