MR. CUSTER
(Fred Darian / Al DeLory / Joseph Van Winkle)

Larry Verne - 1960
Charlie Drake - 1960


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As recorded by LARRY VERNE:


((Shrieks and `Red Indian sounds' in background)

(That famous day in history)
(The men of the 7th Cavalry went riding on)
(And from the rear a voice was heard)
(A brave young man with a trembling word rang loud and clear)

What am I doin' here?

Please Mr. Custer, I don't wanna go
Hey, Mr. Custer, please don't make me go
I had a dream last night about the comin' fight
Somebody yelled "Attack!"
And there I stood with a arrow in my back.

Please Mr. Custer, I don't wanna go
(Forward, HO-O-O-O-O!) Oooohhhh

SPOKEN:
Look at them bushes out there, they're movin'
And there's a injun behind every one
Hey, Mr. Custer, you mind if I be excused the rest of the afternoon?
HEY CHARLIE, DUCK YER HEAD!!
(Sound of arrow whizzing by)
Hmm, you're a little bit late on that one, Charlie
Whooh, I bet that smarts!

(They were sure of victory
(The men of the 7th Cavalry, as they rode on)
(But then from the rear a voice was heard)
(That same brave voice with the trembling word rang loud and clear)

What am I doin' here?

Please Mr. Custer, I don't wanna go
Listen, Mr. Custer, please don't make me go
There's a redskin waitin' out there, just fixin to take my hair
A coward I've been called, cuz I don't wanna wind up dead or bald

Please Mr. Custer, I don't wanna go
(Forward, HO-O-O-O-O!) Oooohhhh

SPOKEN:
I wonder what the injun word for friend is
Let's see....friend.....kemo sabe, that's it
KEMO SABE!, HEY OUT THERE, KEMO SABE!
(Sound of arrow whizzing by)
No, that itn't it
Look at 'em out there
Runnin' around like a bunch of wild Indians, heh-heh
Nah, this ain't no time for jokin'
(Sound of arrows whizzing by)


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As recorded by CHARLIE DRAKE:


(Shrieks and `Red Indian sounds' in background)

(That famous day in history)
(The men of the 7th cavalry went riding on)
(And from the rear a voice was heard)
(A brave young man with a trembling word rang loud and clear)

What am I doing here?

Please Mr.Custer, I don't wanna go
Eh, er, Mr.Custer? Please don't make me go
I had a dream last night about the comin' fight
Somebody yelled "Attack!"
And there I stood with an arrow in my back
Please Mr.Custer, I don't wanna go
Oh-oh, oh..

SPOKEN:
Look at `em bushes out there, they're movin'
There's an Indian behind every one of `em
Er, um, Mr.Custer
May I be excused for the rest of the afternoon, please?
Wanna change my library book
OY, WATCH OUT, DUCK YOUR HEAD!
Oo-er, bit late on that one, son
God, I bet that don't half hurt

(They were sure of victory)
(The men of the 7th Cavalry as they rolled on)
(When from the rear a voice was heard)
(That same great voice with a trembling word rang loud and clear)

What am I doing here?

Please Mr.Custer, I don't wanna go
Er, listen, er, Mr.Custer? Please don't make me go
There's a redskin waitin'out there, waitin' to cut my hair
A coward I've been called
But I don't wanna wind up dead or bald
Please Mr.Custer, I don't wanna go
Oo-errr, err-oo

SPOKEN:
Now, let's see, what's the Indian word for `friend'?
Oh yes, I know – manyarna, yeah that's it
Oy, you lot out there `Manyarna'
(Arrow whizzes by) Ooo!
Oooh! No, that ain't it
Look at `em out there
Running around like a bunch of wild Indians
Bunch of wild Indians! Ha-ha-ha-ha
Now this is no time for joking
(Sound of many arrows whizzing by)
Oo…oh…oo…help!
Mr Custer?
Oh my God!

(Fades)


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