MY AARDVARK WEARS SNOWSHOES(Nonsense song, sung to the tune of "On Top Of Old Smokey")




My aardvark wears snowshoes
My grandmother's green
And my red neon necktie
Can barely be seen 

My aardvark went shopping
For a purple toupee
When the FBI stopped him
On the Appian Way 

Then without any warning
The G-man fell dead
While visions of aardvarks
They danced in his head 

Then a nine-legged chicken
Laid an egg on his toes
Which hatched out a Martian
With a forty foot nose 

The nose was so monstrous
That it weighed down his head
He turned with great effort
To the chicken and said 

My aardvark wears snowshoes
My grandmother's green
And my red neon necktie
Can barely be seen














(Contributed by  - May 2009)