SHALL I BE AN OLD MAN'S DARLING?
Haines / Hancock

as rec by Gracie Fields  1938  


I'm in such a tangle
Since a bloke began to dangle
All his tainted gold in front of mother's eyes!
He said I'd be secure for life,
If I'd only be his wife!

Now I'm not goin' to marry
And old Tom, Dick, or Harry,
It's me poor but honest state I idolise!
But mother says that I should wed
Old Mister Moneybags instead!

Although me heart is free
And money's tempting me,
I'm crazy on me sweetheart Dave!
Shall I be an old man's darling,
Or shall I be a young man's slave?

The old man may be bent,
But he can pay the rent!
But can he buy the love I crave?
Shall I be an old man's darling,
Or shall I be a young man's slave?

David, David, dearest darling David,
Don't let filthy lucre come between us!
David, David, make some money David,
If you don't you'll lose your little Venus!

Now shall I sell me soul,
Or shall I draw the dole
And go without me permanent wave?
Shall I be an old man's darling,
Or shall I be a young man's slave?

Mother keeps on nagging all day long;
Her tongue is waggin',
Says that love is just a lot of tommy rot!
"Better wed for wealth and ease,
Love develops housemaid's knees!
You'll slave just like a ******
And you'll lose your lovely figure
And the beautiful proportions that you've got!".
Well maybe I could do much worse
Than be a Rip Van Winkle's nurse!

David, David, dearest darling David,
Save me from this wicked monster's clutches!
David, D-d-d-david, Get a move on David
If you don't I'll slosh him with his crutches!

I wouldn't care two pins
If only I was twins,
I wouldn't have to misbehave!
'Cause one could be the old man's darling,
But I should be the young man's slave!
Hoo-hoo-hoo, yes I would and all!
I don't like old me,
I much prefer young men,
Don't you?

(The ***** replaces an offensive word not suitable for print)

(Transcribed by Peter Akers - July 2012)