SHUT THE DOOR (THEY'RE COMIN' THROUGH THE WINDOW)
(I. Felix Austed -1926 Original)
(Later attributed to Wally Ives / Dick Howard / James Kern / Billy Mann)
Wally Ives & His Rythmodians - 1926
Billy Murray & Walter Scanlon - 1929
Macey & Smalle - 1929
Roy Fox & His Band - 1934
Jay Wilbur's Connecticut Collegians (vocal: Jack Lorimar & Leslie Rome) - 1934
Bert Pearl & The Gang - 1946
Cal Shrum & His Rhythm Rangers - 1947
Lulu Belle & Scotty - 1961
The Ames Brothers - 1963
The Buffalo Bills - 1965
ORIGINAL VERSION:
I know a certain fellow by the name of Andy Gooch
He went out and drank up three-quarters of homemade hooch
As he sat there on the kerbstone, what he said I couldn't tell
I think it was a menagerie, for I heard him loudly yell
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Shut the window, they're comin' through the door
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Oh gosh, now they're comin' through the floor
One night the boys were playing at a friendly game of crap
When outside in the hallway there came a gentle wrap
In just about two seconds the place with cops was blue
And as they hid beneath the chairs, they sand this chorus through
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Shut the window, they're comin' through the door
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Oh gosh, all my money's on the floor
Now Alawishus Murphy got married one fine day
And far out in the country he went and moved away
But every single weekend that one and only train
Would bring his Wife's relations, then he'd sing this refrain
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Shut the window, they're comin' through the door
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Oh gosh, how I love my Mother-In-Law!
********************
LATER VERSION:
I know a certain fellow by the name of Andy Gooch
Who started seein' funny things from drinkin' too much hooch
Around his bed pink elephants and zebras played about
A purple monkey kissed him twice and he began to shout
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Shut the window, they're comin' through the door
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Oh, the room is full and won't hold any more
A man lived out in Kansas in a cottage by the sea
One night he called the Sheriff up and said, "They're robbing me
There's twenty crooks around the house, please tell me what to do"
The Sheriff said, "Don't let them in, that's my advice to you"
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Shut the window, they're comin' through the door
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Oh, the room is full and won't hold any more
John Newlywed was waiting for the stork to bring an heir
Out came the nurse who said, "Two storks have just brought you a pair
Oh, there's more storks a-circling 'round, I think they're gonna light
There's gonna be a hot time for the poor old storks tonight"
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Shut the window, they're comin' through the door
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Oh, the room is full and won't hold any more
My wife went in for rabbits and she kept them in a hutch
She only bought two rabbits and it didn't seem like much
One morning when we looked at them, how they'd multiplied
A million rabbits hopped right out and all the neighbours cried
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Shut the window, they're comin' through the door
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Oh, the room is full and won't hold any more
The first week we were married, my dear wifie said to me
"I'm feeling oh so lonesome for my darling family
Why not invite them for awhile, we've lots of room to spare?"
They eat me out of house and home, they're getting in my hair
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Shut the window, they're comin' through the door
Shut the door, they're comin' through the window
Oh, the room is full and won't hold any more
********************
As recorded by BILLY MURRAY & WALTER SCANLON, November 1929:
Be careful of your conversation on the telephone
For other people may hear things just meant for you alone
The other night the wires were crossed, and though it sounds absurd
Here's a little earful of the things we overheard
Hello! Hello! Is this the Sheriff's office?
(Yeah, this is the Sheriff speakin')
Say, I live up in Hackensack in a house down by the sea
(Oh, you live up in Hackensack. Well, why blame that on me?)
There are twenty crooks around the house, so, sheriff, I need you
(Now don't you get excited and I'll tell you what to do)
Yes?
(Shut the door)
Ah, but they're coming through the window
(Oh, well, shut the window)
Now they're coming through the door.
(Well, shut the door)
Yes, but they're coming through the window
Oh, the room is full and it won't hold any more
Hello, is this the menagerie?
(Yes)
This is Andy Gooch
(Did you say Gooch or Hooch?)
Say, don't get sarcasm
My room is full of elephants, they're coloured green and pink
Also purple monkeys and I cannot sleep a wink
(Ah, we'd like to take them from you, but there's no room in the Zoo)
They're bringing my relations down so what am I to do?
(Oh, shut the door)
They're coming through the window
(Well, shut the window)
They're coming through the door.
(Ah, shut the door)
But they're coming through the window
Look, now they're coming right up through the floor
Hello, Mister Newlywed, this is the doctor speaking.
(Ah, yes, yes, yes, doctor)
I called you up to say a stork brought you a son and heir.
(Great!)
Another stork brought you a girl
(Well, I don't mind a pair)
I see more storks circling round and think they're going to light
(Oh, doc, do me a favour, please)
I'll try with all my might
(Say, shut the door)
Ah, but they're coming through the window.
(Well, shut the window)
Ha, now they're coming in the door.
(Yes, but doctor, shut the door)
They're coming through the window.
Boy, you're in luck they only brought you four.
(Good night!)
Hello, Wall Street oh-oh-oh-ooh
(Yes, this is Takem and Skinnem, brokers)
Say, you told me to tell all my friends to buy a certain stock
I told 'em and they bought it, and now they're all in hock
(Well, my advice to you, old man, is take it on the run)
Gee, I'd like to, but they're all outside and each one has a gun
(Well, shut the door)
Ah, but they're coming through the window
(Yes? Well, shut the window)
Look, they're coming through the door
(Ha! Well, shut the door)
Help, they're coming through the window
BOTH: That's all there is, there isn't any more
********************
As recorded by ROY FOX & HIS BAND:
Be careful of your conversation on the telephone
For other people may hear things just meant for you alone
The other night the wires were crossed, and though it sounds absurd
Here's a little earful of the things we overheard
Hello! Hello! Is this the Sheriff's office?
(Yeah, this is the Sheriff speakin')
Say, I live up in Wigan in a house down by the sea
(Oh, you live up in Wigan. Well, why blame that on me?)
There are twenty crooks around the house, oh, sheriff, I need you
(Now don't you get excited and I'll tell you what to do)
Yes?
(Shut the door)
Ah, but they're coming through the window
(Well, shut the window)
Now they're coming through the door.
(Well, shut the door)
Yes, but they're coming through the window
Oh, the room is full and won't hold any more
Now money's very hard to get and harder still to keep
I had a dream, and in my dream I won the Irish Sweep
A million friends I never knew came crowding round my stair
I asked my wife what I should do? She said, "Give them the air"
(Shut the door)
Oh, they're coming through the window.
(Well, shut the window)
Now they're coming through the door
(Shut the door)
Oh, they're coming through the window
Oh, I never had so many friends before
Hello! Is this the menagerie?
(Yes)
This is Andy Gooch
Did you say Gooch or Hooch?
Say, don't get sarcasm!
My room is full of elephants; they're coloured green and pink
Also purple monkeys, and I cannot sleep a wink
(We'd like to take them from you, but there's no room in the Zoo)
They're bringing their relations now, so what am I to do?
(Shut the door)
They're coming through the window
(Well, shut the window)
They're coming through the door
(Well, shut the door)
But they're coming through the window.
Look! Now they're coming right up through the floor
Is that you, Mister Jimlyboob? I'm scared as I can be
I knew this house was haunted, my ghost has company
The place is full of ghostisses, they're creeping round about
My ghost has thrown a party
(Well, why don't you throw them out? And shut the door)
They're coming through the window
(Well, shut the window)
They're coming through the door
(Aw, shut the door)
They're coming through the window
Ev'ry ghost, with wife and kids and ma-in-law
(Transcribed by Mel Priddle - November 2017)
