THE BATTLE OF KOOKAMONGA
(Parody of the "Battle of New Orleans" by Johnny Horton)
(Jimmie Driftwood / J.J. Reynolds)

Homer & Jethro (Henry D. "Homer" Haynes & Kenneth C. "Jethro" Burns)



In 1959 we took a little hike
With our scout master down to Lake Oneeganite.
We took a little pizza and we took some saurkrauts,
And we marched along together till we heard The Girl Scouts.

CHORUS
We're the boys from Camp Kookamonga!
Our mothers sent us here for to study nature's ways.
We learned to make sparks by rubbing sticks together,
But if we catch the girls then we'll set the woods ablaze!
(And I was mad because me mother sent me up here! Ha-ha-ha!)

Well we crept up to the water and we see the girls a-swimmin.
There musta been 100 of them pretty young women!
They looked so fine even birds forgot to sing!
We lay down in the poison oak and didn't say a thing.

CHORUS

(Hey, will one of you fellas scratch my back?)

Well our counselor said we could take them by surprise;
If we didn't say a word till we looked them in the eyes.
We kept real still and we had our eyes aglued!
We saw how they were dressed they were swimming in the...wellll now!

CHORUS

Well they ran through the briars and they ran through the brambles,
And they ran through the bushes where a rabbit couldn't go!
They ran so fast even we couldn't catch them,
From Lake Oneeganite all the way to Buffalo!
(Hey, fellers, wait for me!)

Well we ran right after them till everyone was pooped,
So we rested for a moment and our forces we regrouped.
Then we saw the girls behind some evergreens
Captured by a company of United States Marines!

CHORUS

(Aww, them big guys get everything!)

Well they ran through the briars and they ran through the brambles,
And they ran through the bushes where a rabbit couldn't go!
They ran so fast even we couldn't catch them,
From Lake Oneeganite all the way to Buffalo!

A-rootie-toot-toot, a-rootie-toot-toot,
A-we are the boys from the Boy Scout troop!
We don't smoke and we don't chew,
And we don't go where the girls that do!

(fade out of calling and whooping)


(Contributed by ah07_1999 - June 2006)


*****


THE BATTLE OF NEW ORLEANS
(Jimmy Driftwood)

Johnny Horton



In 1814 we took a little trip
Along with Colonel Jackson down the mighty Mississip
We took a little bacon and we took a little beans
And we caught the bloody British in the town of New Orleans

We fired our guns and the British kept a'comin'
There wasn't nigh as many as there was a while ago
We fired once more and they began to runnin'
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

We looked down the river and we seed the British come
And there must have been a hundred of 'em beatin' on the drum
They stepped so high and they made their bugles ring
We stood behind our cotton bales and didn't say a thing

We fired our guns and the British kept a'comin'
There wasn't nigh as many as there was a while ago
We fired once more and they began to runnin'
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

Old Hickory said we could take 'em by surprise
If we didn't fire our muskets till we looked 'em in the eyes
We held our fire till we seed their faces well
Then we opened up our squirrel guns and gave 'em ..Well....we...

…fired our guns and the British kept a'comin'
There wasn't nigh as many as there was a while ago
We fired once more and they began to runnin'
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

Yeah they ran through the briars and they ran through the brambles
And they ran through the bushes where a rabbit couldn't go
They ran so fast that the hounds couldn't catch 'em
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

We fired our cannon till the barrel melted down
So we grabbed an alligator and we fought another round
We filled his head with cannonballs 'n' powdered his behind
And when we touched the powder off, the gator lost his mind

We fired our guns and the British kept a'comin'
There wasn't nigh as many as there was a while ago
We fired once more and they began to runnin'
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

Yeah they ran through the briars and they ran through the brambles
And they ran through the bushes where a rabbit couldn't go
They ran so fast that the hounds couldn't catch 'em
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

SPOKEN TAG

Hut, hut, three, four
Sound off, three, four
Hut, hut, three, four
Sound off, three, four
Hut, hut, three, four


*****