THE MUSKETEERS
From the Broadway Show "Animal Crackers" (1928)
(Bert Kalmar / Harry Ruby)


The Marx Brothers (Broadway Production) - 1928



Unless we tell you who we are, you'll never guess 
We're not Napoleon or da Vinci 
A lot of people think we are, but none the less 
We're not Napoleon or da Vinci 
We're not even Washington or Lincoln 
Jefferson or Alexander Carr 
You'd be wrong whoever you begin on 
So we'll let you in on who we are 
So stand by, unseen listeners

We're four of the three musketeers 
We've been together for years 
Eenie, meenie, minee, (car horn) 
Four of the three musketeers 
We live by the sword, by the sea, by the way 
And we fight day and night 
And we sleep night and day 
My country 'tis of thee 
Land of the light wines and beers 
We're cheered from Cologne to Algiers 
Each time our motto appears 
It's one for all and two for five 
We're four of the three musketeers

When the Queen needs recreation 
And she strolls along the path 
Where are we? 
Right by her side
 
When she's filled with jubilation 
Or consumed with raging wrath 
Where are we? 
Right by her side 

We've sworn that we'd shield and protect her 
We're her guardsmen, true and tried
 
When she gets up in the morning
And she slips into her bath 
Where are we?
Far from the old folks at home

We're four of the three musketeers 
We've been together for years 
Athos, Pathos, Mathos, (car horn) 
Four of the three musketeers 
We fight for the King, for the Queen, for the Jack 
And we're first at the front 
When the front's at the back 
Three cheers for Richelieu 
Here's how we give him the cheers 
The foe trembles each time it hears 
This motto ring in its ears 
It's one for all and two for five 
We're four of the three musketeers







(Contributed by Mel - November 2009)