THEY ALWAYS PICK ON ME
(Lyrics: Stanley Murphy / Music: Harry Von Tilzer)


Ada Jones - 1911
Mae Questal (as the voice of Betty Boop, feat. in the cartoon film "Minnie The Moocher") - 1932
Alice Faye (feat. in the film "Hello Frisco, Hello") - 1941
Tiny Time - 1969


When I was born, my Pa and Ma
They looked at me and said, "Oh, pshaw!"
The doctor said, "It's a girl, I think" 
And Pa went out and got a drink
Then Ma said I looked just like Pa
And Pa said I took after Ma
Aunt Jane said I looked like a quince
And I've been a stepchild ever since


They always, always pick on me
They never, never let me be
I'm so very lonesome, awfully sad
It's a long time since I've been glad
But I know what I'll do by and by
I'll eat some worms and then I'll die
And when I'm gone, you wait and see
They'll all be sorry that they picked on me


My Ma put me to bed and said
The angels watched me in the bed
They wouldn't let things frighten me
Then the angels started biting me.
When my Ma sends me to the store
I lose the change, then she gets sore
I lost my cat and my bow-wow
I think I'm losing something now


They always, always pick on me
They never, never let me be
I'm so very lonesome, awfully sad
It's a long time since I've been glad
But I know what I'll do by and by
I'll eat some worms and then I'll die
And when I'm gone, you wait and see
They'll all be sorry that they picked on me


One morning just at four o'clock
Somebody tried to pick our lock
I knew 'twas Papa, sure as sin
So I opened the door and let him in
My Ma said, "What time is it, Pa?"
"It's twelve o'clock," my Pa told Ma
Just then the cuckoo cuckooed four
And Pa made me cuckoo eight times more


They always, always pick on me
They never, never let me be
I'm so very lonesome, awfully sad
It's a long time since I've been glad
But I know what I'll do by and by
I'll eat some worms and then I'll die
And when I'm gone, you wait and see
They'll all be sorry that they picked on me 




**********




Different last chorus as recorded by ADA JONES:




They always, always pick on me
They never, never let me be
I'm so very lonesome, awfully sad
It's a long time since I've been glad
But I know what I'll do, it's no joke
I'll eat a frog and then I'll croak
And when I'm gone, you wait and see
They'll all be sorry that they picked on me




(Transcribed by Mel Priddle - February 2011)