THE YING TONG SONG
(Spike Milligan)
The Goons - 1956


(orchestral intro) 

Tenor: There's a song that I recall My mother sang to me. 

Sprigs (off): Oh! (a sigh) 

Tenor: She sang it as she tucked me in When I was ninety-three. (harp 
plays a rising chord...) 

Sprigs: I diddle, I. Who was that bum? 

Bluebottle + Sprigs: Ying tong ying tong Ying tong ying tong Ying tong 
iddle I po, Ying tong ying tong Ying tong ying
tong (bluebottle drops behind) Ying tong iddle I po 

Sprigs: Keep lad up. Keep. 

Bluebottle: Keep up lad up. 

Both: Ying tong ying tong Ying tong ying tong Ying tong iddle I po 

Sprigs: lad 

Both: Ying tong ying tong Ying tong iddle I po (lad) Iddle I po (lad) 
Ying tong ying tong Ying tong (Sprigs: iddle)
(Bluebottle: ying tong) Ying tong iddle I po Ying tong ying tong iddle 


Bluebottle (spoken): Ying tong iddle I po! 

(short raspberry, Secombe) 

Both: Oh! Ying tong ying tong Ying tong ying tong Ying tong iddle I po 
Ying tong ying tong Ying tong iddle I po Iddle I po! 

(trumpet bit) 

Bluebottle: Ying. Ying tongy tongy. Ying tong iddle I po. Ying tong 
iddle I po. 

(Secombe under this: What a lovely lovely boy!) Ying ying ying tongy 
tongy. 

(Milligan: Get out the rifle, sir.) Yeeeng. Ying tong ying tong 
d'gy-n'o. Ying tong d'ga. 

(Secombe: Get away.) D'g d'g d'ga. Ying tong iddle I po. 

Seagoon: Hear that crazy rhythm Driving me insane. Strike your partner 
on the bonce. (thump) 

Eccles: Ooh. I felt no pain. 

(Bluebottle screeches) 

Seagoon, Bluebottle and Eccles: Ying tong ying tong Ying tong ying 

tong Ying... 

(harp chord rises) 

Soprano: Take me back to Vienna.... 

(Raspberry section, probably Milligan) 

Bloodnok: Ohhhhh! 

Eccles: Oh! 

(harp chord) 

Soprano: Take me back to Vienna, where the.... 

(crash!) 

Seagoon, Sprigs and Bluebottle (far off): Ying tong ying tong Ying 
tong ying tong Ying tong iddle I po Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po 

(mad dash to foreground) 

Ying tong ying tong Ying tong ying tong Ying tong iddle I po 

(Sprigs: keep going lad) 

Ying tong ying tong Ying tong iddle I po 

Seagoon: LOOK OUT! 

(cry from Bluebottle) 

(mad dash to distance) 

(hastily) Ying tong ying tong Ying tong ying tong Ying tong iddle I po 
Ying tong ying tong Ying tong iddle I po (dash to
foreground) Ying tong... 

(whine of bomb dropping, explosion) 

Double speed, but same tempo, Goons: Ying tong ying tong Ying tong 
ying tong Ying tong iddle I po Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po Iddle I po. Ying tong ying tong Ying tong ying 
tong Ying tong iddle I po Ying tong ying tong Ying tong
iddle I po Iddle I po. 

One: Ying! Tongy tongy tongy. Yiddy diddy diddy da daaa. Ying diddy. 
Ying tong diddle. Yiddada boo. 

(rhythmic thigh slapping, raspberry) 

All: Ying tong ying tong Ying tong iddle Ying tong iddle I po Ying 
tong ying tong Ying tong iddle I po Iddle I po. 

Bluebottle?: Whoooooh!