TOAST
(Bernard Kelly)


Streetband (vocal: Paul Young) - 1978


Morning all. I'd like to tell you about when I was a young boy. Must have 
been three or four months old at the time. I didn't really know what I 
wanted, and if I did, I wouldn't have been able to tell anybody, 'cause all 
I could do was gurgle. 
So, I sat there in me highchair, thinking one day, looking at me tray and 
thinking what I'd give for a meal on there. 
So, I started looking round to see what I could have. 
I was rubbing me eggy soldier in me head, trying to think, and I looked in 
the corner and there's a little breadbin with its mouth open, just staring 
at me, like. 
And then I looked in and I saw bread.
I thought, oh yeah, I'll have toast, a little piece of toast.

Well, then I started getting older, I hated this, I hated that.
Expensive steak was ludicrous and cafes couldn't cater for the finer things 
in life. The upper crust was not for me, I could tell that.
So I go back home, switch the kitchen light on, put the grill on,
Slip a slice under and have toast, a little piece of toast.

'Cause there's so much to choose from.
There's brown bread, white bread, all sorts of wholemeal bread.
It comes in funny packages with writin' on the side.
But it doesn't matter which one you have
'Cause you cut the crust off, have it with marmalade or butter, cheese, 
tomatoes, beans, banana, or chocolate if you're strange.
It doesn't really matter.
Oh no, it all goes with toast, just toast.

I'm gonna think about it some...

That's toast, mmm yeah, just toast

That's toast, just toast

Well, I go down the supermarket with me basket in me 'and
I'm walkin' from one counter to another
Trying to find the bread stall, but I can't find it anywhere
And then I bump into a mother with a baby in a basket
And she says,
"Oh look, you started him off again. I come down here for a little bit of 
peace and quiet to get some bread to go home to make toast, just toast, 
I like toast"
Yeah, but I don't 'alf like toast

Okay, scrape that toast, boys.

That's toast, yeah, just toast

I can't think about it any more. 
I've got to go and have some, it's no good. 
'Ere listen, I'm getting a bit browned off standing 'ere. 
Me too. 
Shall we go and have some toast? 
Good idea. 
Why not? 
Okay, I got the grill on. 
Got any brown bread? 
Yeah! Or we got wholemeal bread? Toast! Wheatmeal bread? Toast!
All sorts of toast. 
Let's go.........

Put the kettle on.
It's over here, don't worry about it. 'Ere y'are.
Is this the bread bin?
It is.
Get the old bread out.
This is thin sliced.

(Sounds of toast being eaten)

Mmm, nice that!

(Sound of kettle whistling)






(Transcribed by Mel Priddle - October 2015)