TWENTY-FOUR HOURS IN TUNBRIDGE WELLS
Neil Innes and Eric Idle
The most exciting place in the world for sailors
With the most exciting wicked naughty girls
More exciting than a book of Norman Mailer's
That's Tunbridge Wells!
We're on our way to Tunbridge Wells
Tunbridge Wells casts its magic spells
We'll spend all day in Tunbridge Wells
And smell all the Tunbridge Wells smells
sniff - AHH!
Where the women are women
and the men are rougher and tougher than the worst of hell's men
Tunbridge, Tunbridge -
Starting soon on Rutland Weekend, a new series of Classically
Bad American Films, commencing with the touching tale of three
laughing, singing, dancing, lovable American sailors with 24 hours
liberty in one of the most exciting towns in Kent.
Tunbridge Wells on closing day
Nuttin' to do and nuttin' to say
Gonna shout out HIP HOORRAY!
I got 24 hours in Tunbridge Wells to while...
We've been to Leamington -
We've been to Malvern -
And we've been to Cheltenham with all of the swells
But the place we dig the most in the world is
(Contributed by =Ae= - December 2013)