WATCHING THE DETECTIVES
Elvis Costello


Nice girls, not one with a defect
cellophane shrink-wrapped, so correct
Red dogs under illegal legs,
She looks so good that he gets down and begs
She is watching the detectives, ooh - "he's so cute"
She is watching the detectives when they shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot.
They beat him up until the tear-drops start. 
But he can't be wounded 'cause he's got no heart

Long shot of that jumping sign
Visible shivers running down my spine
Cut the baby taking off her clothes
Close-up of the sign that says "We never close"
You snatch a tune, you match a cigarrette. 
She pulls the eyes out with a face like a magnet

I don't know how much more of this I can take
She filing her finger nails while they're dragging the lake
She is . . .

You think you're alone until you realize you're in it.
Now your fear is here to stay. Love is here for a visit.
They call is instant justice when it's past the legal limit.
Someone's scratching at the window. I wonder who is it?
The detectives come to check if you belong to the parents
who are ready to hear the worst about their daughter's disappearance.
Though it nearly took a miracle to get you to stay
it only took my little fingers to blow you away

Just like watching the detectives. Don't get cute
It's just like watching the detectives. I get so angry when the tear-
drops start
but he can't be wounded cause he's got no heart.
Watching the detectives. It's just like watching the detectives.
Watching the detectives. Watching the detectives.



(Contributed by Shay Griffiths - November 2002)