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WHEN YOU ARE OLD AND GRAY Ton Lehrer Tom Lehrer (vocal & piano) rec Jan 22nd 1953 Boston Since I still appreciate you, Let's find love while we may, Because I know I'll hate you When you are old and gray! So say you love me here and now, I'll make the most of that! Say you love and trust me, For I know you'll disgust me When you're old and getting fat! An awful debility, A lessened utility, A loss of mobility Is a strong possibility! In all probability I'll lose my virility, And you your fertility And desirability! And this possibility Of total sterility Will lead to hostility And a sense of futility. So let's act with agility While we still have the facility, For we'll soon reach senility And lose the ability! Your teeth will start to go, dear, Your waist will start to spread. In twenty years or so, dear, I'll wish that you were dead! I'll never love you then at all The way I do today, So please remember When I leave in December, I told you so in May! (Contributed by Peter Akers - December 2010)


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