YOU'RE THE REASON OUR KIDS ARE UGLY
(Lola Jean Dillon / L.E. White)

Loretta Lynn & Conway Twitty - 1978
Kacey Jones & Delbert McClinton - 2000




CONWAY:
Well, you're the reason I'm ridin' around on big-capped tires
LORETTA:
And you're the reason I'm hangin' our clothes outside on wires
BOTH:
And you're the reason our kids are ugly, little darlin'
Oh, but looks ain't everything
And money ain't everything
But I love you just the same
 
CONWAY:
Well, you're the reason I changed to beer from soda pop
LORETTA:
And you're the reason I never get to go to the beauty shop
BOTH:
And you're the reason our kids are ugly, little darlin'
Oh, but looks ain't everything
And money ain't everything
But I love you just the same
 
BOTH:
I guess that we won't ever have everything we need
'Cause when we get ahead, it's got a double mouth to feed
 
LORETTA:
And that's the reason my good looks, and my figure is gone
CONWAY:
And that's the reason that I ain't got no hair to comb
BOTH:
And you're the reason our kids are ugly, little darlin'
Oh, but looks ain't everything
And money ain't everything
But I love you just the same
 
SPOKEN...
LORETTA: Conway, why in the devil don't you go and shave, 
and put on a clean pair of pants?
CONWAY: But Loretta, look at yourself. I wish you'd take them curlers outta your hair and go put on a little make-up and get outta that housecoat before supper.
LORETTA: Well let me tell you somethin' Conway. Considering everything that I went through today, I look like a movie star.
CONWAY: Yeah, Ruth Buzzi.
LORETTA: Thank you.
CONWAY: Besides that, all of our kids took after your part of the family anyways.
LORETTA: Oh, they did, huh? What about the ones that's bald?
CONWAY: (Laughs) Well, I guess you might say they took after me (Laughs)











(Contributed by  - June 2010)